BIO – Tim Wallis

You can see his charisma from space. His organ donation card also lists his smile. He once hit a grand slam with nobody on base. He wears Oakley’s, not to protect his eyes from the sun, but to protect the sun from his eyes. He once received a speeding ticket while he was rounding the bases. He can slam a revolving door. The supercontinent Pangaea was separated by the boom of his first homerun. His feces is used as currency in Stephenville. He once told Michael Jackson a ghost story and he turned white, permanently. The moon’s craters were caused by his homeruns. His bat is considered a weapon of mass destruction. 

Wallis	Avg	AB	R	H	RBI	2B	3B	HR	BB	K	PO	A	E	SAC	SB	GIDP	OBP	FLDG	Games
2003	0.500	4	1	2	2	0	0	0	0	0	5	0	1	0	0	0	0.500	0.833	1
2004	0.511	47	22	24	19	2	4	0	1		34	4	3	2	0	1	0.500	0.927	13
2005	0.566	99	44	56	46	8	6	5	5	0	53	10	11	1	1	2	0.581	0.851	28
2006	0.622	143	65	89	83	23	12	20	5	0	81	19	15	4	2	0	0.618	0.870	40
2007	0.652	155	75	101	88	26	18	8	3	1	87	24	12	7	3	0	0.630	0.902	43
2008	0.756	123	74	93	104	19	17	16	3	0	52	8	6	8	5	0	0.716	0.909	37
2009	0.689	106	58	73	64	23	11	7	4	1	69	6	6	6	0	0	0.664	0.926	29
2010	0.685	92	51	63	58	10	6	12	6	0	61	5	7	8	3	0	0.651	0.904	32
Career	0.651	769	390	501	464	111	74	68	27	2	442	76	61	36	14	3	0.635	0.895	223